In parents' defense, if you are distant, overly susceptible to criticism, your feelings are easily hurt and unapproachable, your kids will never:
1. tell you who really drew on the wall
2. tell you that you're fat
3. question everything you ever say from breakfast to bedtime
4. ask why their penis gets big in the morning
5. want to include you in the operation on the dog
6. tell you your cooking is "sub-par"
7. ask how John Lennon died
8. scream climax in the middle of Trader Joes
9. ask what kind of priest Al Green is
10. ask if he's a doozer or a fraggle
Life does sound a bit easier.